How the fuck did I manage to get so slack on my #TMI Tuesdays?!
Oh yeah….I very rarely ever to never follow through with shit
(part of my charm folks)
Moving right along, let’s get this #TMI train a fuckin movin ey?
*Todays post is brought to you by internet that I am stealing off an unsecure connection. The cable company was NOT kidding when they said they were shutting it off. Terrorists.
*This week I actually admitted, asked AND accepted help. Turns out that is far more productive than just getting pissed and going back to bed.
*Yesterday I left the pool because of an out of control, shit talking, toddler size spawn of Satan. I have never wanted to smack a child that wasn’t mine until yesterday. Usually I’m all for you parent yours and Ill parent mine but for fucks sake if yours is screaming bloody fucking murder and calling you (the adult that should be in charge) a stupid head then take the little brat home. I sure as shit don’t want to listen to that crap and I can’t imagine the other people at the pool (many of whom don’t even have children…they just wanted to RELAX by the pool) want to hear it either. And do not gimme that “I have great patience” bull shit because that is not patience. That my dear disturbed woman is how our jails get over crowded.
*When I get my llama (that TayTay can’t have) I’m going to name him Wilbur.
*I’m a bridesmaid in my sister’s wedding and I refuse to buy shoes. I really don’t see the point….like my shoes stay on when I drink anyway.
*The hem of my dress pants is out so my pants are currently taped with packing tape (couldnt locate the duct tape)
*When someone calls my office to book an appointment and I say “Our first available is September 9th” and they reply with “Is there anything sooner?” I have a hell of a time NOT screaming “DID I FUCKING STUTTER?! I said our FIRST available.” into the phone.
*I am seriously craving some new ink
*It’s true some people really can be outsmarted by a cardboard box. I’ve seen it happen.
Single Parent Bloggers Rock;>
just found you from a comment over @ the bloggess….
i must tell you, i think you are my soul sista.
awesome shit. seriously.
God fucking bless the internet! I’ve found another soul sister….well, fine…she found me…same difference!
Omg how fucked up is the bloggess’s ET-esq house?! Christ on a bicycle that shit is not funny but a lil funny because the bloggess is fucking hiarious
My Bridesmaids and I were barefoot, I didn’t want to wear shoes so why make them.
Last wedding I went to, the bridesmaids wore sneakers, covered in glitter. It was freaking awesome.
And my sitter’s kid (the one I bitched about in my last post), was one of THOSE kids you had at the pool. OMG, she drove me nuts. BUT she was f’ing terrified of me, because she knew I was more than happy to set her straight. If she was doing something wrong and I walked into the room, she would run and go hide behind her mom, literally.
Other people can really suck sometimes.
I hate it when people ask stupid/obvious questions. It drives me crazy!! I’m always temped to tell them something off the wall.
Pretty nice post. I just stumbled upon your blog and wanted to say that I have really enjoyed browsing your blog posts. In any case I’ll be subscribing to your feed and I hope you write again soon!