Posted in BastardCat, Wordless wednesday
Tagged bastard cat, wordless wednesday, wtfwednesday
@thebastardcat has decided to take his furry ass to school.
That or he’s a stow-away in the PIT’s backpack just waiting for the right moment to pop out and cause a kitty-ruckus….
Yeah, that is a kitty-ruckus-esq look for certain…..
He *thinks* I can’t see him.
I actually CAN see you dumbass
He does this often yet never remembers to hide his big fat hairy tail which always gives him away. Plus, I had *just* made my bed but noooo…the little fucker destroyed it. It’s his fault I no longer make my bed.
He’s getting rather plump these days too. He eats all the damn time. He just plops himself where ever he pleases like he owns the joint
Give me my happy pills and close your legs. Or put some pants on.
He is out of control quite frankly.
But then again….so is she….
this is her "Check out my new side bangs" pic...she took it herself...
Seriously, the only person on the planet who is a bigger attention whore than these two is Brett fucking Favre.
"look at me, look at me!!"
Check out the baby rockstar apparel…so cute I *almost* want another baby. I bet I could get the bastardcat into a onesie…. hmmmmmmm
After a mini vacation with Nana, the PIT is home….currently running laps around the apartment stating “mom, I need to get ready for running club this year”, which is total bull shit. She’s avoiding bedtime. Little does she know….it’s not her bedtime for another hour. She only *thinks* we’re negotiating.
Plus, it’s hilarious to watch the BastardCat chase her nipping at her dress.
Double Plus, look at this face…..sometimes, I like to let her win and run around the house like a crazy lady, giggling and yelling at the cat the entire time.
I’m not sure exactly what this move is but I am certain it’s a Lucci original
She will never, ever miss an opportunity to strike a pose (I believe this one is a squirrel pose)
She is an excellent little diver
While the PIT and I have been at the pool almost every damn day, the bastardcat has been getting rather fat. He’s growing into quite the beast.
Don’t worry….it’s not his own tail that he’s devouring. It’s his favorite toy…a racoon tail.
And then he turns his attention to the camera. And gets way to fucking close and then proceeded to squeeze kitty snot all over the camera. Asshole.
He’s lucky he’s cute or I swear I’d boot his furry butt across the room
Yeah I know, I’ve been slack. Summer is a busy time!
Plus, the PIT refuses to get out of the pool,
ever,
and I hate posting from the phone.
Aside from swimming her little butt off, the PIT is busy being a kid.
She’s way to busy for her mother unless she’s bleeding or hungry.
There are way too many kids in my house most days.
Thebastardcat and I try to take cover but the kid posse always finds us.
Help me...
Thankfully, thebastardcat is far more fun to flop around than I am so usually the kids want nothing to do with me…except for Devin…
I *think* he has a crush on me.
One evening the girls were giggling in the other room when Devin came barreling through the front door and sat directly next to me on thesofa, looking at me with those big brown eyes of his.
I was working on the laptop updating my calendar when Devin said
“I really like calendars too”.
“do ya now?!” I replied “when’s your birthday Devin? I’ll need to add it to my calendar” I told him.
His eyes lit up and he told me his birthday.
I added it to my calendar, “there. Now YOU are on my calendar lil dude”
“what about jade?” Devin asked (jade is his sister)
“that’s pretty cool of you Devin, to think of your sister…girls need brothers like you, looking out for em” I said
“yeah but she’s mean” he said
“sisters aren’t supposed to be nice. If they were nice the whole balance of life would be thrown on it’s bum. It’s in the rules” I explained
“do you have sisters?” he asked
“no but I am a sister and Im still mean to my brother. Because he’s an ass and it’s my duty”
One doesn’t even need to ask….his face says it all.
Posted in and then theres this kinda shit, BastardCat, Being a mom rocks even when being a single mom blows, PIT=Princess or Punk in training-depends on her mood
Tagged a good reason why I should never explain things to children, bastard cat, I make it up as I go kids, motherhood, the PIT, why sisters are mean to brothers
What.the.fuck.Wednesday….or at least that is what I’m calling this random update.
I think it’s time to find BastardCat rehab.
He is a disease.
The PIT & I discovered his dirty little secret one morning and when we tried to take his ‘drug’ away…he flipped the fuck out. His big fat black paws flailing all over trying to grab onto the PIT’s arm, sharp little teeth holding onto his ‘drug’ with the craziest look in his eyes and at one point I SWEAR his eyes were red.
Bastardcat is a lollipop hugging, sugar addict with fangs and fur.
His tail is the biggest part of him and yet he ‘discovers’ it daily…and chases it..in the bathtub….pretty amusing actually
At this point I got the hair dryer and shot him until he let go
What?
I was running late. I don’t have time to take the pictures AND deal with his shit.
Week Two of chasing dreams, acknowledging passion and seeking out MomStar Adventures
This week’s small steps~
*Try Yoga (yes this carried over from last week so what)
*Keep Carlos with me at all times and snap as many random pics as I can….seek out the sights in pursuit of a perfect shot
*Skip smoke breaks (Im not ready to quit but it certainly won’t hurt to cut down)
*Clean the PIT’s room (someone call FEMA)
*Finish off another jug of milk like a champ (yay me)
*#assslap the shit out of my girlys so they won’t forget how fucking fabulous they are
*Game night with the PIT (we may have to lock bastardcat in the bathroom so we can play but Im down for that)
*Get the oil changed (apparently those ‘suggestion’ lights are not suggestions after all. Yes. My father is a mechanic. If he knew how long its been….he’d beat my ass…and Id deserve it!)
*Write….my ‘must post’ posts this week…#TMI Tuesday (even @sassysinglemama is getting in on this….you should too) and #SMR (I love #SMR)
*Tell the PIT I love her for no reason and that she makes me so proud everyday just because I can
*Research ‘Ralph’ (secret MomStar project. Cant disclose any details at this time.)
This weeks adventures include:
*me being a MomStar at the PIT’s school for track & field day
*a wedding dance for classmates I havent seen since graduation day…(bring on the booze!!)
*a trip to see auntie april! (Oh how I miss my bestie & lil man…cant wait to see you guys!)
(I *might* behave. We shall see…depends if @taytayllamalady joins us for the road trip….she is a bad influence on me)
Well I have been seriously slacking on the #TMI Tuesday thing
What, there was like 2 #TMI Tuesdays and that was IT?
No more #TMI Tuesdays for the rest of time?!
Calm down. Tuesdays, like most things, depend on my mood.
Today my mood is #TMI Tuesday
deal with it
~I have never seen any of the Karate Kid movies. None of them. My mom made us PLAY OUTSIDE
~If Clint Eastwood were to run for office….Id be his campaign groupie
Actually Im just looking for a reason to say things like “I reckon so” and “Get off my lawn”
~I think there should be a stimulus package for NOT reproducing like rabbits
A “thank you” for being reasonable and getting your tubes tied & fried
~I’m fairly certain BastardCat is snorting pixie sticks..or he has SunDowners
~Yesterday, I drank milk for the first time in 9 years. Still as gross as I recall
Today I drank another glass of milk. Still disgusting but allegedly good for me
~When Oprah retires…..
I think I should get her sofa…to share with a badass rockstarmama posse
(Like…The Bloggess, Danielle, MsSingleMama, Morgan, Kadi, Mely, Jellie
and KatVonD
simply because she fucking rocks)
and a few dudes that are NOT dinks…
I bet we could change the world
~I currently own 2 (yeah TWO) pair of jeans. I hate shopping.
~I have a sister (who ROCKS) 18 years younger than me…her mother…..was my 6th grade teacher
~I spent $67 on hair conditioner today and just because I’m worth it…the shit is DA BOMB
~My favorite “date” thus far was a sunny afternoon in the fall….porch swinging…..
~My first concert ever–Prince. That little fucker can MOVE….holy shit balls…that was a great show.
~Yesterday, Bastardcat started his boxing career.
In the bathroom
~IF I could reproduce……Dierks would SO be my next baby daddy
He looks amused doesn’t he?
Well that’s what happens when you mess with the PIT @TheBastardCat.
She will wear you fucker.
As pay back @TheBastardCat has been trying to kill not only me, but my plants.
I moved my plants outside after I noticed a crop circle the size of @TheBastardCat’s furry ass in my houseplants.
In his best attempt to get at my plants, he wedged himself between the glass and the screen door.
He *thinks* I’m not able to see him……he *thinks* wrong.
I can in fact see him and quite frankly….I do not like that look he’s giving me.
Feed your friggin need
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