Being pregnant can be scary enough.
Preterm labor and the risk of losing your baby is a whole new kind of scary.
This….is my story….
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It was like any other night.
I finished my shift at the hospital and was home around midnight.
Mr. Meth was still working at this time, we had been married for 21 days, I was 26 weeks pregnant and mr meth had recently started acting odd.
I was home around midnight, tired and feeling like ass from a nasty cold but Mr. Meth was MIA. He should have been home from work before me.
This was still rather new behavior; it was the first time I thought “holy hell. I’m on my own.”
You see, that night in January when I had a nasty cold, a coughing fit sent me into preterm labor.
I knew that these pains I were no normal pains that a pregnant woman should have, at least not yet.
I called Mr. Meth over & over but he never answered…ass.
I headed to the hospital alone.
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26 weeks into my pregnancy and I was hooked up to monitors, IVs and scared shitless.
Barely past the half way point is not far enough!
“What the hell was happening here and where the fuck is my husband?!?” I thought to myself.
My doctor came in and explained to me that I was dilated to 2 and 90% effaced.
Interesting, now what the fuck does that mean doc?!
Well, apparently that means that your cervix is preparing for delivery even though the baby’s not done cookin and that is a problem.
A big problem.
You’re not supposed to start effacing until much later in the pregnancy and the doctor told me that “when you go into labor, you’re going to go quick”
Ok…so what are we talking here? She’s like gonna slip out?! What the hell do I do now?!
A baby’s chances of survival at 26 weeks is not that great ok…I was freaking out, absolutely terrified and incredibly pissed off.
Mr. Meth showed up at the hospital around 2am…by then I had already been seen by the doctors and the labor had been stopped…I was told to rest…no stress—obviously they had no idea my husband was a stress inducing asshole.
In order to attempt the no stress I simply ignored him when he came in my room.
“Are you ok?” he asked
“Yup” I said and that was that.
I told him that I was being kept overnight for observation…which was a blatant lie.
Shortly after he left my doctor came back in and went over my discharge instructions and told me that I was hereby on strict bed rest—I wouldn’t be working anymore.
That sucked because I actually liked working at this time!
I went home….alone…Mr. Meth was not there when I arrived…who knows where he was.
I didn’t care.
I was worn out and all the fighting and stressing with him was clearly having a bad impact on me and the baby.
I was exhausted from the fear of “oh shit-what was that pain?! Omg was that another one?!”
I was scared, worried, tired, depressed, disappointed and alone.
I spent the remainder of my pregnancy like that.
Scared, worried, tired, depressed and alone.
I went in to my doctor every week for the rest of the pregnancy as well…that gets kinda fucking annoying ya know?
Being pregnant is scary enough, I mean I remember barely being pregnant and thinking “there is not a day that I’m not going to think about this baby inside me” granted, I’m an all star worrier but add preterm labor into the mix and I’m beyond terrified.
Thankfully, I worked (well up until that night) at the hospital so the nurses knew me and my crazy ways and they were very tolerant of my every frazzled frantic phone call asking if “this” is normal (like it’s easy to assess a pregnant woman over the phone)
They were patient and kind every time I coughed my way back into the preterm room.
Without them I would have been utterly alone and I’m grateful that I wasn’t.
They helped get my through the rest of the pregnancy and they were there when I delivered at 39 ½ weeks.
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Today the PIT is pushing 8 years old and is healthy, active and never ever shuts up!
Each year we participate in the March Of Dimes WalkAmerica which is a charity close to my heart for obvious reasons.
Last year we walked in honor of Kolton who was born far too early at just 27 weeks and spend months in the hospital.
The latest report from his dad?
Kolton is doing great! Healthy and active giving his brother a run for his money!
The PIT and I are excited to see Kolton and his family at this years walk!
We’re praying for sunshine this year..seriously..we’ve walked this in the snow! We want sun!!
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*If you or someone close to you has a preterm labor story that you would like to share please email me at
notyouraveragesinglemomma@gmail.com
Single Parent Bloggers Rock;>
