It would be a complete and total horse shit lie if I were to tell you that being a single momma rocks all the time.
Sure I don’t have to share my child with anyone, I parent my own way without any interference, I know that every holiday she will be with me and at the end of everyday she kisses me goodnight.
Yes being a mom rocks….always.
But sometimes being a single mom blows goats.
You’re always going to attend family night at her school alone…other parents are always gonna look at you and wonder where “the dad” is. You’re going to be the one she’s pissed off at after getting shots at her annual checkup.
When you’re a single mom you can often find yourself asking “well now wtf am I supposed to do?!”
for example…say you’re a single momma to a beatiful little baby..an infant who refuses to nap.ever. and you really need to shower before your next shift at the hospital because you’re starting to stink…sooooo wtf do I do with this kid while I shower? Hope she’s alright while I take the worlds fastest shower? Bathe with baby wipes? Ahhhh how do ppl do this?!?
Well, ppl like me strap the infant in her car seat or her bouncy chair and pull her in the bathroom with me where I can see her if she trys anything amazing…or if my “husband” comes to steal her. But then after a short time, she out grows the bouncy chair and hates her car seat. Now what? She’s mobile now! Crawling all over rhe place, opening every cupboard and drawer she finds.
Fuck. I’m never going to shower ever again.
I’m going to seriously stank… Or….i’ll shower at snack time. Strap her in the high chair, pull the high chair in the bathroom with me and crack open a jar of her favorite snacks…green beans and those nasty little gerber beef sticks. (those this are mcfuckinraunch btw. The PIT loved em but everytime I popped a jar open the dogs literally went bonkers. At one point I thought the lil 5 pound beast I called sir Winston duke, my pomapoo puppy, was going to break down the bathroom door to get to the gawdamn high chair in hopes the PIT would notice him..as she always did…and toss him a chunk or two of those disgusting beef sticks.)
I’m may never get to shower alone again but at least I can shower! (appreciate showers..they shouldn’t be taken for granted)
Being a single parents of a sick PIT blows too.
When she’s sick and we’re out of motrin I have to drag her sick little butt to the store with me. That sucks for both of us…she just wants to rest but I can’t be in two places at once…she’s always gonna be drug along for the ride..even when she feels like ass. Of course theres always the possibility that shes going to blow chunks before you even get out of your garage which makes getting to the store extra interesting. Not to mention that kids are incredibly extra whiney when they’re sick.
Single parents have no where to run.
That sick whiney kid coughing all over the place with a snotty nose is going to be stuck to your ass like a clingy little monster until she feels better.
(Yay…..fuck…mommas tired and you’re whiney voice is making me crazy. Like nails on a blackboard girlie…shhhhhhhhhhhh!)
When you’re sick and your kid isn’t it’s equally frustrating. The kid is not gonna leave you alone.ever.
They need you…even when you’re sick..you’re all they’ve got.
You are their HERO
There are ups and downs in every aspect of life…single parenting is not above the roller coaster ride that is life.
Single Parent Bloggers Rock;>
Love your post! I truly feel your pain. I am not a single mom myself, but do have five kids which is painful enough. I couldn’t even begin to fathom how single parenting would be like. Visiting you from MBC. Visit my crazy world if you ever get a chance.
http://superheroesmom.com
I will remember this post when I am complaining tomorrow about taking care of the kids and how long the day is! Thanks for putting it into perspective!
And thanks for joining the Honest Mommy Bloggers club!
Tamara
http://www.theunexperiencedmom.com
Ain’t it the truth?
Loves me some you.
I’m in awe of single mothers. You articulate what it feels like to be a single mother amazingly.
Thank you so much for saying so……makes my guts giddy when I receive heartfelt compliments
Thanks for stopping by!
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I will remember this post when I am complaining tomorrow about taking care of the kids and how long the day is! Thanks for putting it into perspective!
+1
Sometimes being a single dad blows too! It would be nice if a single mom blew me, but that’s a whole different topic…
I found your site through singlemommyhood and yeah I’m the “sometimes” single ,Witchy Woman, bra-strap-showing-whiny married mom who apparently a lot of people do not like right now. I’m effed up but you your a momstar! I love your blog, it’s brave, funky and eye opening.
I’ll be following you a lot now ;-)
People rarely ever like me either…but that’s part of my charm ;)
I am glad that you came by, taking the time to read my story & comment……shows a lot of class. Especially ballsy considering the riot you started lol (i have been known to start a few of those myself) I like ballsy..keep it up ;)
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I am so glad I found your blog. Now I have someone I can confess to totally and completely “showering” with baby wipes about 3 times between both my daughters. It would be 4, but that time doesn’t count since I only got as far as my elbow before girl #2 woke up. And in Arizona, that shit doesn’t fly.
Welcome mama! I’m glad you found me too…..let the good times and momstar confession roll!
LOVE your blog and your complete honesty. Love how you are able to really tell it how it is. I bring my little one in the shower with me!!
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Thanks for your blog. I completely feel you when you say there is nowhere to run. And don’t you think there should be a separate term for those of us who are full-time single moms with no visits with their dad? I mean, that has a whole set of other complications, but really, it is different scenario when there are no breaks from the solo mommihood.
Oh hells yes there should be. Some ppl often forget that there is a BIG difference. Welcome btw :)
http://notyouraveragesinglemomma.com/2010/09/09/an-open-letter-to-women-who-bitch-about-only-getting-a-couple-hundred-bucks-in-child-support-think-they-felt-like-a-single-mom-and-considers-not-having-a-garage-struggling/
I love your blog, and I’m a guy! I’m a single dad that’s all alone as well, so I can relate to what you say on so many levels. Keep the great blogging going!
Joe
Sorry, the field to enter in website didn’t go thru… Here it is
http://www.linkedin.com/in/freelancewebsitedesignersseo
I LOVE this I’m a single mom also & I definitely still shower w/the door open or wait until he’s sleeping. My son just turned 4 & is non-verbal w/autism. Trying to cook a meal is a huge task. Unfortunately he doesn’t have any concept of danger so I’m blocking him from the stove w/my leg while I try to stir whatever is in the pot. Its a funny scene to watch but extremely hard to accomplish